Enjoy The Film

It’s the backward weirdy human rule in life that when we leave our stuff behind in the cinema we only come back to collect the rubbishy sentimental stuff that other lowlifes decide they quite fancy.

I’m standing behind box office in the waiting room for the back office, it’s a cold airless, window-less chair-less clinical room that you have to wait in before you go into the cash office, to have your money counted and then get bollocked for not upselling enough and for having no explanation as to where the fify quid went that your float is down on.  But I’d rather be here than waiting at the dentist’s.  Anyway, it’s where the bulk of the lost property goes.  The valuable stuff should be in the cash office but no one seems to give a fuck.  So there is a steady stream of staff coming through here to stroke the shiny new dark grey iPod Nano 3rd generation some stoopid eedgit has not only left behind in a screen but not bothered to come back to collect.  There is a long list of underpaid staff here who are in the valley of temptation because the managers have not bothered to hold it in the cash office.

It beggars belief what customers do not come back for. Bizzarely, though, a lot of customers do come back for missing odd gloves and scarves that have walked, probably with another customer.

I’ve handled a Mercedes Benz car key and pondered how that rich person managed to get home and avoid their car park fine.  I’ve seen wallets stuffed full of credit cards.  Yes credit cards can be cancelled but why not ask the cinema first before going through all that hassle????  And what about all the other personal cards we hold in our wallets and purses? Membership cards, driving license, reward cards…. Businesses are not slow to charge for a replacement card these days.

And then there are mobile phones.  Maybe people are thinking leave it at the cinema, report it lost and ask your telco for a nice new one.  But what about all the personal information we have on our phones?  While we are on the subject of personal information on mobile phones, never leave it lying around if you don’t want other people to look inside it.  Being a manager in a cinema is not a job if you want to liked.  So if you are married and then start taking time off with another member of staff it’s only a matter of time before the rumour mill kicks in.  And when you leave your mobile phone unattended with messages on it that are best described as embarressing……before you know it everyone else has read them..